Ahhh, it’s that time of the year, New Year, where spirits are high, motivation is up, dreams are abundant and hopes are plentiful! One of the most universal and wonderful habits during this period is making a resolution. Why wouldn’t one want to take advantage of the occasion and start a new leaf with new aspirations and new promises? It all sounds fantastic and makes you all tingly inside, doesn’t it?
Here’s the hard truth though, according to a research from the University of Scranton, only eight per cent of people actually achieve their New Year’s goals. Eight percent! In other words, 92 out of 100 people fail to reach their dreams. Are you among this bunch who gave up on your dreams? Well, that sounds a bit harsh!
Alright, let’s rephrase the question. Do you remember what goals you set last year? What was it or what were they? How did you do? Did you achieve it? If not, how close did you get to achieving those goals? Are you satisfied with your accomplishments? My guess is some of you may not remember your resolutions, many of you didn’t follow through with them and may be thinking “another year, another resolution…down the drain!”.
Many people get impulsive in setting new goals, especially in the New Year. Unfortunately many can’t even track down how close they were in reaching them throughout the year. So why do we bother making them in the first place! I’ll share with you three reasons why we should NOT make a new year’s resolution:
1. If we can’t break down our goals into digestible and do-able tactics and strategies, then we really shouldn’t make one at all.
When we say “I want to lose 15 kgs in one year”, do we really know how to achieve that? Does it make us feel challenged or lost? A goal is supposed to make us feel a little uncomfortable inside, but just as importantly, it’s supposed to make us feel like we CAN achieve it! What good does it do if we already feel defeated before the battle even started? Compare to “I want to lose 15 kgs in one year, which equals to 1.25 kgs per month”. Doesn’t that goal sound more attainable and enticing? When you’re setting a goal, break it down to smaller-scaled tactics.
2. If you can’t hold yourself accountable for your resolutions, give them up!
Commitment is a promise you keep because you feel accountable for it. When making a resolution, we are painting a dream that requires a commitment in order to achieve it. The irony of a commitment is that most people can keep promises to other people more than they can to themselves.
If this is the case, maybe it’ll be worth your while to make a resolution as a promise to somebody else. You can ask a friend, or a family member, or a mentor to help you. A couple of weeks ago, my girlfriends and I shared our 2015 resolutions in front of each other; one person took note and afterwards shared the list of goals to the group.
When I read the minutes, truthfully it made me feel a bit anxious about letting down the group by not keeping my promise. Hence, I suppose it’s a good thing that other people heard my resolutions and can come back and check on my progress or commitment from time to time.
3. If you can’t envision the impact and true benefits of your goals, then why make them?
How is your goal going to affect your life? How is it going to make you feel? If you can’t say that your resolutions will make your life or other people’s lives better, more meaningful and enriched, and you a happier person, then you might want to consider redefining your resolution. It’s not that I don’t endorse shallow goals, but if we can’t feel in our gut how our goals will truly make us happy, then we won’t really put our heart into our efforts; and consequently if we don’t end up reaching them then we can resort to feeling like we haven’t lost anything anyway! For example, let’s say your goal is to go on an Alaskan cruise because you’ve never been on a cruise ship and one of your dreams is to see the glaciers.
Try redefining that goal into a feeling of happiness, joy and pride. And try to envision how the trip will enrich your life by way of seeing a different part of the world, seeing the wonders of nature and meeting people from all over. If you can visualise the true positive impacts your goal will bring to your life, then you will more likely strive to achieve it, because by not attaining it, you will not have only failed to reach a goal, but more importantly you have lost part of your happiness.
This article has been published in Now! Jakarta magazine
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